Are you keeping up with me according to my Instagram account? Because if you play along with me on social media I am drinking chilled rosé as the sun sets on beautiful beaches while wearing boho dresses that are ethically produced in Byron Bay.
My children are smiling all the time, with no food smeared on their faces.
I have cute dogs that I walk twice a day, I attend balls with flawless hair and makeup and I hang out with Bindi Irwin on her 21st and do lots for charity. Gosh, I am fabulous!
Except, I am not. My Instagram is not a lie on purpose, but I use it as a record for keeping track of the milestones in life, so of course I am going to use the one photo of the kids all smiling that took me 128 photos filled with disaster to achieve.
I am happy when I do something exciting or meet someone exciting, so I guess I tend to get caught up in the fever of all that and post those pictures, rather than me doing the dishes for the hundredth time that week.
My social media feed is a highlights reel, but a wonderful article written by Holly Wainwright this month has taken off. She promotes sharing an ‘I don’t’ list on your own social media accounts.
It is all about battling the ‘superwoman syndrome’. I am asked at least once a day how I do it all. This implies I am smashing some goals when the reality is most days are a bit of a blur. I haven’t exercised in eight years. I usually drink wine at home watching trashy TV in my pyjamas.
I am not whipping up amazing breakfasts before running the kids to school in my environmentally-friendly car and then meeting friends for a soy latte before heading off to work two hours early.
I skate through the working week in a blur of happiness, knowing that life right now is sweet. I have a wonderful job and three little children who are unfurling like precious flowers before my eyes. It’s a beautiful big fat mess! But I would also like to keep it real so here is my ‘I don’t’ list:
I don’t make the beds every day. I do not have French linen sheets and thriving indoor plants in my bedroom. The bed is a safe space for the whole family, including the dogs, and I have a stash of Vicks next to my bed sitting on top of a million unread kids books, a pair or dirty reading glasses and a box of tissues. Swanky indeed!
I don’t make the kids go to bed on time often enough. Maybe because I work late or maybe because I like watching Survivor with them, we never seem to nail an early night-time routine and the next morning they are tired little troopers. I don’t have a clear inbox. I don’t grow my own coriander. I don’t shave my legs very often.
And if I did all this stuff I would be bonkers and possibly the worst parent in the world, because most days I do shower the kids with lots of love and good food and praise. And for now, that is more than enough of the things that matter.